"Not All Dreams Happen While You’re Sleeping"
My stomach was churning with excitement and nerves. My hands were shaking as they played with my necklace and re-adjusted my shirt for the millionth time. I had heard his voice less than a minute before and now I would finally get the moment I’d been waiting for since I last saw him almost two months before. The plane had landed safely and we were going to spend the next two weeks in California, a long ways from the overly humid Michigan summer. As my heart began to ache from the familiar feeling of love, I saw the first few passengers entering the baggage claim area where I had been sitting. Nervously, I began searching for his familiar ash-brown hair and as soon as I caught sight of him a lump formed in my throat. I must have looked odd walking towards him because I had lost feeling in my legs, a great example of the over-whelming feeling he gives me. Finally after the longest time we’d spend apart since meeting when I was sixteen, I wrapped my arms around him and the tears fell from my eyes onto his shoulders. He was with me and we were one again.
After arriving at my parent’s house and showing him around, we were free to just sit and talk as we always have. Conversation flows easier when you love someone and there is no such thing as an awkward silence anymore. That night was just us talking and being together again, the reunion we thought might not come. After all, I had thought I was moving to California and leaving him behind for good. Love has a tricky way of making such things impossible. Even with the better part of a continent separating us we still couldn’t let go and I was already planning my return to Michigan so we would never have to suffer that distance again.
The first few days were just business as usual at my parent’s house, with the everyday activities and family meals at the end of the day. Ryan joined us in everything; it was as if he became an honorary member of my family and seeing him interact with them made me smile more times than ever before. Here before my eyes were the five people I loved most in the entire world. My heart was beginning to ache with the thought of leaving such a beautiful thing. I was lucky to have him there when he was for it was going to break a part of me when I left my family again and he was the only person who I trusted enough to cry in front of and tell my exact feelings to. I had a lot on my mind and more weighing on my heart. It was going to be a hard couple of weeks.
Trying to still have some fun while we could and experience more of California together, we decided to go whale watching and spend a day in Monterey Bay that was conveniently a short drive from my parent’s house. The day couldn’t be more idyllic! Seeing the whales, going to the aquarium, shopping, eating lunch together and playing in the ocean, it all left me feeling higher than I would have imagined. Remembering that day immediately places a smile on my face as well as a warm feeling in my soul. It was a day for laughs and hugs; it was a day for us and no one else.
Time was passing by faster than I had hoped and all I could think about was the moment where I would have to hug my family goodbye and leave them thousands of miles behind me. Ryan and I chose to spend our last few days amongst my family and again participating in the tasks strangers would consider meaningless but to me it was the stuff that made their house home. When you’re a military family your house loses all worth to you and instead washing the dishes you’ve washed for years is what makes you feel at home, along with your family of course. Home for me was the smell of my mom’s cooking and the sounds of them all laughing. The sounds and smells my family make are what I would miss as well as their presence. In all fairness, Ryan had never asked me to come back. Instead he thought it wise to choose my family but somehow I found being without my family easier, since I had done it many times before, but I had never been without Ryan since we met and so that was harder on me.
Ryan’s hand was upon mine the night before our plane was to leave. Both of our flights were planned for the early morning, only five minutes separated our departure times so we decided to spend the night awake in hopes we would sleep on the plane. I confessed to feeling torn. I had to give up one thing in order to have the other and though I had already made my choice it didn’t mean I wasn’t wondering if it was the right one. It just didn’t make sense, why was I being forced to choose between my parents and my boyfriend? I wanted something to blame so I could feel better but when nothing came to mind I let it go. I hugged my sister before she went to bed, and I didn’t want to let her go. I simply told her that one-day she could come see me in Michigan and when I had my own place she could even live with me someday. Her cheeks were still wet with tears as I kissed her. My brother was easier; he was always pretty comfortable with change or he’s able to be distant like my dad. As my Mom hugged me in the airport parking lot, she began to cry too, it wasn’t the first time she’d cried when I was leaving and I knew it wouldn’t be the last.
My dream was over. I had lived the time in which for a few weeks I had all that I would ever need. I had my family and my lover and we were all under one roof. It was the best dream I could ever have and I only wish it didn’t have to end. Still I know that wasn’t the last time I would have that experience but for now, nothing beats the first time. I am glad I made the choice I did, to be honest. I know that with distance I can still be all of myself and not suffer losing my closeness with my family, especially thanks to modern technology. Ryan and I have been doing great as well, with him recently speaking of living together and me mentioning how we should wait, we are noticing this relationship is still getting better with each passing day. I look back on California and this last fall as a time I can never really forget, definitely a dream come true.
((The End))
So, I'm really hoping this teacher likes this, and that my readers do too, because it does mean something to me after all! Hope you guys liked it! =)
This is a really good paper Michael! :) You have a way with words! Thank you for sharing this with us! Its beautiful and one can definitely tell by reading it that it came from the heart. :)
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